Ever seen a group of tourists and thought, “How can they act like that in public?” Cultural norms change by location. Something that might be normal for some people can be wildly offensive in other countries. It’s crucial to understand the cultural implications of your actions to avoid social faux pas while traveling. Not tailoring your behavior to the culture of your destination is downright rude, and one of the most frustrating parts of dealing with tourists. Let’s look at some American customs that tourists should avoid while traveling.
To populate this list, we started by looking at lists that have already been published on this topic. Then, we corroborated that list with online forum sources dedicated to the countries mentioned. This allowed us to hear the story of the nature of the infraction directly from the natives of those cultures.
Tipping
It might seem unthinkable not to tip the waitress as an American. However, avoiding tipping in certain countries is a social must. In East Asian countries, such as China, Japan, and South Korea, tipping isn’t just a faux pas, it is an insult to tip waitresses. The insult in this case goes two ways. On one hand, people who tip in these countries are implying that they believe that the service staff is poor and needs their pity money. On the other, it also implies that they believe the restaurant doesn’t make enough money to pay their employees a living wage.
Unlike in America, where large swaths of the country believe that a living wage is a privilege and not a right, in most Asian countries, employers take pride in taking care of their employees. They don’t want pity money and they don’t want to be seen as exploitative of their employees.
If your service was exceptionally good outside of the U.S., compliment your server verbally instead of trying to give them money. They will appreciate the compliment without worrying about the social implications of giving gifts to strangers.
Sitting in the Back of a Cab
While it’s normal in American customs to sit in the back of a cab, this isn’t typical in some areas. In some places, like Australia and New Zealand, people take egalitarianism in treating cab drivers fairly very seriously. The expectation is not to treat the cab driver like a servant by sitting in the back. If one is the only passenger in a cab, they are expected to sit shotgun as if they were equal to the driver. Not doing so could be considered a serious social faux pas and contributes to the negative perception of Americans worldwide.
However, there may be exceptions to this rule. For instance, some people are not technically safe to sit up front even as adults due to their height or weight. In these cases, we recommend letting your cab driver know in advance that you need to sit in the back for safety. Explaining that you aren’t trying to treat them poorly, but rather trying not to die in their car will probably get you some points for being empathetic on both axes. Communication goes a long way.
Laughing with Your Mouth Open
It might seem normal in American customs to bust open laughing when seeing something hilarious because in America that’s a very normal thing to do. However, in some areas, such as Japan, laughing with your mouth open is an extremely offensive thing to do. When laughing in Japan, one should always cover their mouth with their hand, especially if they are laughing so hard that they cannot help but open their mouth while doing so. To not cover your mouth while laughing would be highly upsetting in this culture.
The reason traces back to the old Japanese practice of お歯黒 (Ohaguro). This process dyed the teeth black to prevent tooth decay. It was mostly practiced by or on women, but some important men in history also practiced Ohaguro. Ohaguro acted as a coming-of-age ceremony and later became a distinguishing feature of a married woman. However, despite having somewhat noble origins, women would still cover their mouths to avoid showing their black teeth when laughing. While the Japanese no longer widely practice Ohaguro, the culture’s custom of covering the mouth while laughing remains intact.
Customizing Restaurant Orders
In many countries, you won’t be able to customize your restaurant order. Restaurants in Europe and Asia expect you to visit only establishments that suit your predetermined needs rather than going to any establishment and asking for accommodations. The idea is that the chefs have lovingly crafted all of the recipes for the restaurant’s menu and they should be enjoyed as served. Additionally, sometimes substitutions can cause issues in recipes. You can’t typically make a substitution in a recipe 1:1 without any changes to the texture and taste of a dish. So, altering the order can result in the chef doing extra work to try and figure out how to replicate the dish with the substitution. They may also not have the ingredients necessary on hand.
To avoid this faux pas, research restaurants you want to visit beforehand. At the very least, look at a menu before sitting down to ensure that there is something you can and want to eat without making changes or substitutions. Vegans and vegetarians will have a harder time dining out in foreign countries without large communities to support their dietary needs. However, this also extends to people with allergies. The expectation is that they visit establishments that specifically cater to their allergens rather than going to any restaurant and ordering with substitutions.
Getting Restaurant Leftovers To-Go
In Europe, it’s typically not possible to take restaurant leftovers to-go. Food safety in Europe is a little different. When a restaurant in Europe gets an order “to-go” they have to package the food to certain standards for delivery options. However, when taking leftovers from a sit-down meal, this may not be possible to the standard they must meet. There might be a fear that the customer will get sick from the food not being packaged “correctly” and they may even refuse to bag your food to-go if you were a seated customer.
In these countries, it is best to leave your leftovers for the staff to dispose of. Unfortunately, it can feel wasteful as an American to not eat all of your restaurant food, even if you have to eat some of it at home. However, you’ll save yourself the judgmental glares from the staff when you ask and make their jobs more comfortable for them.
Complaining About Restaurant Food
Another European faux pas is complaining about your food to your server and sending it back when eating at restaurants. In the American customs, people feel entitled to getting the meal they want as they want it, even if that means haranguing the employees and making them remake their meals. However, this practice isn’t normal or acceptable in Europe. Tagging along with it being unacceptable to make substitutions in restaurant menus unless specifically offered, it’s also unadvisable to complain about the food and send it back to be remade unless there is a serious health concern.
If the food isn’t as you expect but isn’t inedible, in Europe, it is rude to send it back to have the staff remake it. Not only does this cost the restaurant more in ingredients, but it also calls into question the skill and knowledge of the kitchen staff. If you find a severe problem with the food, such as it being genuinely undercooked to the point of danger, unsanitary (hair in food, etc.), or there is an allergen that was not listed on the menu, you can send the food back. However, if you didn’t like it, they view that as your problem and not theirs.
Keeping Your Shoes on When Entering Someone’s Home
It’s normal in American customs to walk around their homes wearing shoes. However, in Asia and the Caribbean, people don’t just frown upon this practice; it’s very offensive! Taking off your shoes when entering someone’s home is a sign of respect. You are acknowledging the effort they put into keeping their home clean and doing your part to retain the cleanliness of their home. It doesn’t stop at taking your shoes off in some places. In some areas, it’s even rude to keep your socks on in someone else’s home.
It goes a bit further for some cultures where even being barefoot in someone’s home is rude. This might beg the question, “What can I do if I can’t wear shoes, socks, or be barefoot? What’s left?” The answer is slippers! In cultures where it is normal to wear slippers inside the home, your hosts probably have slippers for you to wear inside their home. Having guest slippers ensures that even foreigners who may not have the forethought to know if slippers are normal for the culture can feel included in gatherings with friends. Some cultures also encourage “house shoes” where they have shoes that have not been worn outside. In some cases, guests may even bring their house shoes with them when coming to your home, especially for more formal get-togethers like business meetings where being shoeless might look a bit strange.
Pointing Using Your Index Finger
To be honest, pointing with your index finger can be rude even in American customs. However, when leaving the United States, the act becomes even more offensive. In Asia, Latin America, and some parts of Europe, you’ll need a more delicate touch when indicating the location of something. How to do this differs greatly between cultures. Still, the fact that you shouldn’t point with the index finger remains relatively stable in many cultures.
In the Phillippines, people “point” by indicating a direction with their lips. Some countries prefer to use multiple fingers when pointing to avoid using the index finger alone.
Eating in Public Places Not Designed for Eating
Obviously, if you go to a restaurant, the goal is to sit down and eat. However, in many places, people consider eating in public places not designated for eating as very rude. The idea is that if you are eating in public, you could make a mess. Public cleanliness is very important in some cultures and it is best to avoid eating in public to preserve the cleanliness of the environment for everyone.
Eating in public is especially offensive on Japanese public transit. While it’s not uncommon to see people chowing down a breakfast sandwich on your morning train in American customs, in Japan some rules forbid eating on the train. The Japanese take politeness on trains very seriously. They also forbid you to speak loudly or talk on the phone. Doing so would be rude and earn you some nasty side-eye from the other passengers.
Baby Showers
If you’re going further than visiting another country and outright moving there, make sure you know what the customs around family planning are before you start one. In some countries, there are ample superstitions around family planning which people take very seriously within the culture. One common superstition is that bringing too much attention to the unborn child is bad luck and can harm the child. Thus, a baby shower, celebrating the unborn baby, is not only a faux pas, but it might give your in-laws a heart attack.
Baby showers are a normal part of American customs, but they aren’t a ubiquitous feature of pregnancy worldwide. Before you start planning your baby shower, make sure people where you live will find it acceptable.
- Lang: English (US)
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