There are days when you wake up naturally instead of to the sound of a blaring alarm. These are the days when you get out of bed feeling energized, and you’re excited for what’s to come. They’re called days off. The rest of the time, you’re just reminding yourself why you have to make it to work before you begrudgingly hit the shower and get ready for the day. It’s not always like this, of course. Sometimes you really love your job. But working with others who have different opinions, different ways of handling conflict, and whose worldview differs from yours presents a daily challenge.
To put this list of work expressions together, 247 Tempo scoured the net, reviewing sites where people love to unleash their uncensored thoughts, like Reddit. There is no shortage of sayings about work to relate to and something is comforting in knowing you’re not the only one who feels this way. These hilarious expressions about work make you feel seen, even if you’re reading this hidden inside your corner cubicle (with your screen angled just right so your boss can’t see what you’re doing).
“No man goes before his time — unless the boss leaves early.”
Quote By: Groucho Marx
“I always give 100% at Work: 10% Monday, 23% Tuesday, 40% Wednesday, 22% Thursday, and 5% Friday.”
Quote By: Unknown
“The closest to perfection a person ever comes is when he fills out a job application form.”
Quote By: Stanley J. Randall
“I choose a lazy person to do a hard job because a lazy person will find an easy way to do it.”
Quote By: Bill Gates
“An expert is a man who tells you a simple thing in a confused way in such a fashion as to make you think the confusion is your own fault.”
Quote By: William Castle
“Most of what we call management consists of making it difficult for people to get their work done.”
Quote By: Peter Drucker
“The reward for good work is more work.”
Quote By: Francesca Elisia
“The brain is a wonderful organ; it starts working the moment you get up in the morning and does not stop until you get into the office.”
Quote By: Robert Frost
“Hard work never killed anybody, but why take a chance?”
Quote By: Edgar Bergen
“Give a man a fish, and you’ll feed him for a day. Teach a man to fish, and he’ll buy a funny hat. Talk to a hungry man about fish, and you’re a consultant.”
Quote By: Scott Adams
“Work is the greatest thing in the world, so we should always save some of it for tomorrow.”
Quote By: Don Herold
“As I have gotten older and wiser I discovered that there are six things that I really loved about my job. Pay day, lunch time, quitting time, vacation time, holidays, and of course retirement.”
Woman in a restaurant with her male friend having lunch
Quote By: Tom Goins
“Hear no evil, see no evil, and speak no evil — and you’ll never get a job working for a tabloid.”
Quote By: Phil Pastoret
“My keyboard must be broken, I keep hitting the escape key, but I’m still at work.”
Quote By: Unknown
“Nothing is so embarrassing as watching someone do something that you said couldn’t be done.”
Quote By: Sam Ewing
“The only thing that ever sat its way to success was a hen.”
Native American farmer and retired teacher Jerri Parker grew up on in agriculture, but now she operates her diversified farm in Cromwell, Oklahoma. With hoop houses, vegetables, 300 chickens, eggs and beef, she started sell to the public in 2004. USDA photo by Preston Keres.
Quote By: Sarah Brown
“When in doubt, look intelligent.”
Quote By: Garrison Keillor
“Oh, you hate your job? Why didn’t you say so? There’s a support group for that. It’s called everybody, and they meet at the bar.”
Quote By: Drew Carey
“I love deadlines. I like the whooshing sound they make as they fly by.”
Quote By: Douglas Adams
“Executive ability is deciding quickly and getting somebody else to do the work.”
Quote By: Earl Nightingale
“I always arrive late at the office, but I make up for it by leaving early.”
Quote By: Charles Lamb
“If you had to identify in one word the reason why the human race has not achieved and never will achieve its full potential, that word would be ‘meetings.'”
Two business colleagues working together in meeting space. Mentor instructing newcomer. Young Indian woman with laptop and mid adult man with tablet discussing new project. Teamwork or training concept (Two business colleagues working together in meet
Quote By: Dave Barry
“I work for myself, which is fun. Except when I call in sick, I know I’m lying.”
Black woman drinking hot tea and feeling comfortable
Quote By: Rita Rudner
“Getting paid to sleep… that’s my dream job.”
Quote By: Unknown
“A baseball game is twice as much fun if you’re seeing it on the company’s time.”
Quote By: William C. Feather
“All you need in this life is ignorance and confidence; then success is sure.”
Quote By: Mark Twain
“When a man tells you that he got rich through hard work, ask him: ‘Whose?'”
Quote By: Don Marquis
“I hate when I lose things at work, like pens, papers, sanity, and dreams.”
Quote By: Unknown
“Going to work for a large company is like getting on a train. Are you going sixty miles an hour or is the train going sixty miles an hour and you’re just sitting still?”
Quote By: J. Paul Getty
“People often say that motivation doesn’t last. Well neither does bathing. That’s why we recommend it daily.”
Quote By: Zig Ziglar
“I think Smithers picked me because of my motivational skills. Everyone says they have to work a lot harder when I’m around.”
Quote By: Homer Simpson