If you grew up in the South, you know there are numerous etiquette rules Southerners never break. People from the South are known for being friendlier and more polite than their Northern neighbors and Southerners have many unspoken rules that don’t necessarily apply anywhere else in the country.
While some Southern manners seem like more of a suggestion, there are plenty of other rules Southerners take very seriously. Even though these rules aren’t written down, they’re passed on from generation to generation. Some rules that might seem archaic in other parts of the country are simply a part of Southern culture.
Many Southern rules that used to exist have been done away with, but many other rules still exist in Southern culture today. The etiquette rules Southerners never break range from offering a strong handshake when you meet someone to removing your hat at the table. If you’re visiting or moving to the South and want to know what to expect, it’s important to learn the unspoken rules of the South. (To learn more about these rules, check out 15 Etiquette Rules the South is Known For.)
To create a list of etiquette rules Southerners never break, 24/7 Tempo consulted several publications including Southern Living, Yahoo, and Forbes. Here are 15 etiquette rules Southerners always follow.
Offer a strong handshake
Your handshake is one of the first impressions you give when meeting someone new. Giving a strong handshake and looking someone in the eye when you meet them is an important etiquette rule in the South. While it may be common in other areas to forego the handshake unless it’s a business setting, a strong handshake can go a long way when you’re making a new connection.
Say please and thank you
This is one of the simplest ways to mind your manners in the South, and it’s a rule that should be implemented everywhere. Even though saying please and thank you may seem like a basic rule for any region, you hear those words less and less nowadays. Southerners still say please and thank you to everyone, no matter what their position is. It’s the simplest way to show appreciation.
Pull over for a funeral procession
Not everyone knows how to react when they see a funeral procession. In the South, it’s widely known that you pull over when a funeral procession passes by. This isn’t just a safety tip, it’s also a way to show respect to the family and the person who has passed away. When in doubt, pull over and get out of the way when you see a funeral procession.
Always tip well
Money and receipt being placed on the payment binder for payment of a meal.
Tipping has become a controversial topic in many areas of the country and some people believe it should be done away with altogether. However, Southerners are some of the most generous tippers. No matter what you think about the service or the restaurant, Southerners believe it’s important to tip well.
Offer your seat to those who need it
Offering your seat to someone who needs it more than you is a rule Southerners never break. Typically, if you see a pregnant woman, elderly person, or anyone who looks like they might have trouble standing, it’s polite to offer your seat to them. Even if you’ll be uncomfortable for a little while, it’s more important to be kind.
Keep the conversation light at the dinner table
There’s a time and place in the South for difficult conversations, but the dinner table isn’t it. It’s one of the unspoken rules of the South to keep controversial conversations away from the dinner table. When you gather with friends and family for a meal, it’s a time to enjoy each other’s company and have polite conversations. With controversial topics, things can get heated pretty quickly so it’s best to avoid them at the table.
Eat what’s in front of you
In the South, a lot of the etiquette rules revolve around food. One of the unspoken rules Southerners never break is eating what you’re served. Unless you have a food allergy, you don’t make a fuss about what’s on your plate. Even if it’s something you don’t particularly like. It would be an insult to the host to not eat the food you’re served so always eat what’s in front of you.
Wait until everyone is served
Speaking of serving food, it’s polite to wait until everyone at the table is served before you start eating. While this is still typical in certain places outside of the South, this rule has mostly been done away with. It’s easy for people to start eating right away because they don’t want their food to get cold. However, Southerners wait until everyone has their food before you dig into yours.
Chew with your mouth closed
This etiquette rule should exist everywhere. One of the rudest things you could do at the table is chew with your mouth open, giving everyone at the table a clear view of your food. While it may be overlooked in other regions, you’ll attract some negative attention if you break this rule in the South. It’s also important to avoid talking with your mouth full and making loud noises, such as smacking, while you’re eating.
Send the thank you card
Before text messages and emails, you wrote a thank you card after someone bought you a gift, invited you to their house, or helped you in some way. Nowadays, thank you cards aren’t as common, but they’re still considered polite in the South. When someone does something nice for you, you send a thank you card. No matter how simple it seems, sending a thank you card is the best way to show your appreciation–and don’t forget to send it on time.
Don’t show up empty-handed
Whether you’re going to a potluck or a funeral, you never show up empty-handed as a Southerner. It’s always a good idea to bring food when you’re invited to an event. If you’re visiting someone who’s going through a rough time, bring comfort food. It’s also considered polite to bring a gift for the host when you’re invited to someone’s house, whether you choose to bring a bottle of wine or flowers.
Be sincere
People who aren’t from the South may think the friendliness and affection from Southerners is insincere. This is especially true if you’re not used to people being friendly for no reason. However, one of the rules in the South is to be sincere in your affection. When someone says hello to you or asks you how you’re doing, they genuinely mean it.
Hold the door for the person behind you
This is another rule that should be a given but it has become less common in other states. In the South, this is a rule you don’t break. When someone is walking behind you, you wait and hold the door open for them. It’s even better if you say hello and ask them how they’re doing.
Take your hat off at the table
As a Southerner, you don’t leave your hat on when you’re inside, especially not at the table. Even though this rule isn’t as common in other regions, it’s one that Southerners still hold to today. Some people still remove their hats as a sign of respect in certain scenarios across the country. But in the South, you always take your hat off when you’re inside or when it’s time to eat.
Respect your elders
Respecting your elders is something everyone should do, no matter where they live. However, some people aren’t sure how to show their respect. In the South, respecting your elders might look like standing when they walk in the room or offering your seat at the table. People in the South recognize that our elders deserve respect and that there’s a lot we can learn from them. (Don’t miss these 30 Etiquette Blunders That Convey Rudeness.)